Friday 26 November 2021

Jhamjarhistan: Chapter 4, A Daring Rescue

The sharp-eyed Honeysuckle Weeks, driving Genevieve had seen movement on a nearby hill and turned to investigate. Against all accepted military doctrine, the Kaiserlicher Stab (part of the Zeppelin Korps) have silhouetted themselves against the skyline. This can be excused on their part, as being staff officers and General rank, they can make their own minds up without being confused by the facts. One old military maxim has it, that the most dangerous combination a common soldier can experience is an officer with a map!


A far more lethal threat is still flying above the battlefield. The Gräfin von Stauffenberg is still threatening Snapforce in the vicinity of Djelibad market. Another Luftballon has also joined the fray. Piloted by Ernst Udet, the Great War ace, he seems to have chosen the Basmachi as a target. The Gentlemen's XV is now reduced to the Gentlemen's IX and they are heading to join up with the mortar platoon. The Jats are entering the market place and the Gurkhas are heading for the Emir's Palace in Djelibad. Bottom left, we can see Snapcase who has inched his painful way towards safety, with a sore arse, full of shrapnel. Chulmleigh, his faithful bulldog accompanies him.


The ever-resourceful LACW Weeks lines up the front-facing HMG in Genevieve, preparatory to potting a few Generals. The Zeppelin Korps troopers in the background are shouting a warning to the Kaiserlicher Stab, but to no avail. "Nimm deine verdammten Köpfe runter!"


In the meantime, our hero Vaggers has managed to reach the dig site. Ducking and weaving his way through a hail of lead, the intrepid Yorkshireman espies Bunty Hamster-Crust, hiding behind a Scythian pillar. "Bunty, uz beauty! Ah'm 'eear ta rescue theur. Gerr thy shapely arse ont' pillion, uz flower!" Perhaps the longest speech the reticent SIS agent has ever made to the alluring Bunty. Without further ado, the object of Vagger's passion is aboard his throbbing machine and ready to ride. Just in time too, as the Krasnyy Sotnya are entering the dig site from one side whilst the Basmachi are flooding in from the other.



The Basmachi have overrun the encampment around the dig site. Some of the dig members are fleeing for their lives. Professor Hilary de Spongepants (Rumpole College’s Chair of Archaeology), Lady Camilla Marsupial-Trout and Arabella Fotheringay-Featherstonhaugh were trapped on the roof of the building on the right. Hilary de Spongepants and Camilla Marsupial-Trout were executed in cold-blood by the vicious Basmachi horde, but for some reason Arabella has been spared this end. Trotsky will no doubt be cursing the fact that his daughter is a prisoner of the Basmachi, but grateful that she is at least, still alive.


Ernst Udet navigates his Luftballon acros the field of conflict, aiming to inflict as much damage as possible on the Basmachi.


Enver Pasha and his bodyguard of riders enter the dig site. We can see Carl Rossegger the archaeologist and Charlie Chan, a police detective on holiday from Honolulu. They are about to duck into that doorway behind them to try and avoid the inevitable carnage.


"The infidel camp is ours", cry the Basmachi as Ibrahim Bek leads them forward.


Ernst Udet is still struggling to aim his bombs, obviously somewhat lacking the skill of his Luftballon colleague, the Gräfin von Stauffenberg.


Speaking of the Gräfin von Stauffenberg, having seen the Gentleman's IX disperse to avoid the bombing, she makes anothe bombing run towards the Mooltan Battalion, not caring one iota for the traders and customers in Djelibad's busy market place. A few desultory rifle shots are fired at the Luftballon, but to no effect. The She-Wolf of the Zeppelin Korps scores another hit and five Jats are down out of an original force of eleven. No problem with the morale of this elite regiment though. "Jat Balwan, Jai Bhagwan!" they shout their battle-cry.


In the intervening period, the small vodka-fuelled unit of P'yanyy Kazaks are now busy looting the campsite area of the girls of Hilda Rumpole College Archaeological Society. Rifling through the scattered luggage, it was inescapable that they would discover many items of women's unmentionables. Even the Cheka pass by, registering their disgust at their Cossack compatriots dancing around a wrecked camp site with frilly knickers on their head, consuming even more vodka as they dance the Troika!


To be continued...

2 comments:

Frank O Donnell said...

Stay on there Martin, I think "our hero Vaggers" is over doing thing lol, while the lads dancing around with frillies on there heads is what makes these things worth while :)

Martin Thornton said...

Vaggers looks set to be home in time for tea and medals, Frank! Watch out for those crazy Cossacks, though.