Setting Jhamjarhistan Ablaze - Part the Fifteenth

In true Hollywood fashion, we now have a flashback to the momentous events leading up to the mobilisation of Snapforce. Lieutenant Chippy Minton (of the Honourable Regiment of Felpersham Peculiars) if you recall, had decided to participate in the Great Game. This was a bid on his part to bring promotion and perhaps also honour to the Minton name. The Mintons were a very old family harking back to Norman times when they were awarded the Manor of Trumpton by William the Conqueror. Army officers were known in these difficult times, to take ‘shooting leave’ and set off into the wild and woolly hinterlands of Central Asia. Living as a native and spying on all and sundry, the successful officer would return to Peshawar with valuable information, hopefully in time for tea and medals! The unsuccessful officer would obviously, never return at all.

Chippy had managed to infiltrate the palace of Faqir Al Djelibeybi, the Emir of Jhamjarh in Djelibad. He was posing as a potential tutor to the young Emirzade of Jhamjarh, Gunga Al Djelibeybi.

The ancient Palace of the Emirs of Jhamjarhistan in Djelibad

Chippy, as has been mentioned before, is not the sharpest tool in the box. Indeed his old mater used to refer to him as “not quite the full jar of Marmite!” before packing him off to his boarding school, St. Cake’s.

Upon seeing the vision of lovliness that is the Emira of Jhamjarh, Lakshmibai Al Djelibeybi enter the room during his audience with the Emir, Chippy forgot his surroundings and raised his hat to the Emira. Chippy is a gent of impeccable manners and was acting automatically. The beauteous Emira was astonished to see a mop of blond hair revealed, accompanying the blue eyes of the Mintons. Realising that he was an impostor, the court of the Emir reacted in horror. Even Mrs. Goggins was agog!

The denouement of this gaffe is shown below, in this artists impression. The Emira was the first to act, drawing her revolver and Chippy followed suit. A Jhamjaristani stand-off! Thinking it through (a slow process for Chippy), Chippy came to the conclusion that he was somewhat outnumbered and surrendered his side-arm. Chippy realised that he was now in the stickiest situation since Sticky the Stick Insect got stuck on a sticky bun!

This then, is the moment that Faqir Al Djelibeybi came to the erroneous conclusion that Chippy was on the scout for information relating to the location of the legendary Jhamjarh of the Sticky Gods. Maybe the Jetti from Mysore, Appah Rao would be the very person to extract the truth from Chippy?

To be continued…